Monday, January 19, 2009

My stepfather took our family Saturday night out to one of those Brazilian steakhouses where they attack your face with slabs of meat relentlessly. As has been the case at the last several of these extended family outings, my hot stepsister got wasted (she was drinking patron on the rocks out of a water glass) and proceeded to come over to me and start mouthing "I Want to Fuck You." right in front of her longtime boyfriend, a sweet and teen-idol good looking kid who recently overcame cancer.
The horrible thing is that I would go for it in a second, long-suffering cancer surviving boyfriend or no, if our entire families were not within an arms length at every one of these occasions. Nothing to do but take a swig of her patron, pretend like nothing is happening and allow myself to be fondled under the table. All the while young Brazilian men were running up and thrusting steaming hunks of meat at us. It was bizarre to say the least.

My biological half-sister with the dark hair, above, was traumatized by the whole spectacle. Good fun.

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